"One of the great mansions of Greenwich’s 300-year-old history”On second thought ....
Antares' great mansion has been sold (I believe as part of a settlement of a lawsuit) for $13.750 million, hardly chump change but a bit less than its original price of $25 million. Both prices, by the way, were for a shell of a house - the buyer is expected to add his own necessities like kitchens, baths and light bulbs.
When questioned about this precipitous fall of one of the future great mansions of Greenwich, Antares' principal Joe Beninati was eager to dispel the notion that Antares had blundered.
"You see a long term capital loss," he explained, "but you're wrong. We pulled off a tax-free exchange: we got rid of this ugly pile of stone no one wanted and got back a ton of Lehman Brothers stock, plus a potful - not a handful, a full potful - of magic beans."
Beninati leaned back in his chair, hooked his thumbs under his Vineyard Vines suspenders and looked thoughtfully towards his window, or where a window would be if cubicles had windows. "You know, he drawled, "Jimmy and I turned out to be pretty much a pair of dumb f..ks when it came to real estate. I mean, other than the satisfaction of throwing all those old folks out of their apartments, our Byram condo deal really sucked. Our mansion plan was even worse and as for the redevelopment of Stamford, well...."
He leaned forward, an earnest scowl on his face. "We're not down though, Jimmy and me. We got plans, big plans. Our biggest problem has been figuring out where we can operate without someone smarter than us eating our lunch. And then, just last night, it came to me: we're going to get into collateralized debt obligations, big time. You watch, we're gonna take off like gangbusters. I absolutely guarantee it."
Our interview was terminated when movers arrived to repossess Beninati's desk but he's promised to call me, just as soon as his phone service is restored.
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11 comments:
Geez, I never saw anyone try to milk the name "Greenwich" like those two bumbling brats. I knew that plan in Byram was doomed from day one. The way they bragged and patted themselves on the back..."We just made the biggest real estate deal in CT History"
Talk about buyers remorse,eh?
Ouch.
L.
Great "interview" with Mr. Beniati! Nevertheless, $13,750,000 (as reported today) is an impressive price for a shell of a house in the backcountry. Furthermore, it is a record price for that street and one of the highest prices recorded so far in Greenwich for 2008.
Depends on the value of that Lehman stock, eh? (and the magic beans)
Gideon - I've driven down Langhorne Lane. There's like 10 houses on it, so "record for the street" means less than, perhaps, than a back-country in its entirety statistic!
There are rumors the Antares kids' next investment opportunity will be the bake sale they're holding at the OG Civic Center; that is, if they can come up with the $25 non-refundable deposit.
These gents forgot (or never learned) that goodwill is an invisible, but powerful asset for any business. After the way they treated the seniors in Byram, and the fire in Stamford, I wouldn't buy a dollhouse from Antares.
don't forget, its on a "lake" that most would say is a 1/2 acre puddle (barely a pond).
chris, with this interview, i take it you'll be persona non-grata at polpo.
cos cobber.
I learned the first rule of real estate from my father when I was just a wee lad. I'd innocently referred to a body of water as a lake and my father said, "if you can see across it, it's a pond, unless you're a real estate agent, in which case, even a puddle is a lake." He turned out to be right. "Lake Carrington" indeed.
Ah Chris, you just made my day. Absolutely hilarious and really pretty close to reality.
I must say that you really captured the essence of Joe B who single handedly brought Antares down. The one I truly feel sorry for (besides Mr. Beninati's family) is his partner Jimmy Cabrera, whose level headed investment strategies where overpowered by his cowboy partner.
Good One - Chris - your 'Dad' was a 'Smart Man'!
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